Tales from the Cultural Wilderness - Journal

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2002-01-28 Entry: "Too Bad For Umbrellas"

This weekend had officially unpleasant weather. Not only was it raining (which, admittedly, isn't all that unusual), but the wind was gusting at arbitrarily random intervals (which I guess the definition of "gusting").

My one attempt at leaving the house (the usual Saturday morning paper run) led to me trooping down the garden to my car to get my umbrella from the boot. The garden was still relatively waterlogged from previous rain, so this was a muddy affair, fortunately alleviated by the foot deep rotting leaves in front of the garage door (which I've not bothered to clear yet). On retrieving my brolly I proceeded to the shops.

The optimum umbrella position appeared to be held horizontally in front of me (forming a rain shield), which was slightly unsafe if I'd met oncoming pedestrians (as opposed to an invading Roman army). Having made it half way to the shops, and suffering the "random eddy turns umbrella inside out" effect, I gave up on the umbrella and got a little wet.

It was returning from the shops that I noticed my rain shield had had one unfortunate effect, and that was to channel all the rain being driven at me onto my shins, soaking the bottom half of my jeans. One of the newspapers was also a little worse for wear, but the crossword at least survived intact.

I guess the weather could be described as "too bad for umbrellas."

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