Tales from the Cultural Wilderness - Journal

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2005-02-27 Entry: "Cubed Charm"

"The Witch Is Back" sees a warlock trapped by their ancestor Melinda Warren accidentally released (okay, Prue is set up by her demonic bosses at the auction house) - he can copy their powers when they use them on him. The Charmed Ones summon Melinda to help them vanquish him - this is the first time one of their ancestors comes back... of course, their mother and grandmother make the most frequent appearances, but I seem to recall Melinda showing up again... Piper asks Leo out on a date.

"Wicca Envy" sees the demonic auctioneers astrally projecting to subliminally persuade Prue to steal a tiara from Bucklands. Piper sleeps with Leo - although she keeps accidentally freezing him during the act. Phoebe is looking for a job.

The police come to look for the tiara, but Piper manages to keep freezing them and move its hiding place, even though Rex the auctioneer keeps telling Andy where it is. Phoebe eventually hides it in the attic. Next thing we know, Leo is up there exhibiting magical powers and looking for it. When Piper finds him up there, he says he might have to return home at some point - and home is a long way away.

Prue gets thrown in gaol for killing a security guard at Bucklands. Piper and Phoebe break her out, but Rex gets a photo of them and insists they have to reliquish their powers or he'll turn them in. They go through with the spell and give the lantern with their powers in it to Rex. Hannah turns into a big black panther. Leo, meanwhile, does the glowy hand thing over the Book of Shadows, all the words come back, as do the sisters' powers. They freeze the panther in mid-air, move Rex in the way so Hannah ends up killing him, and then watch her get sucked back to hell.

Andy finds out Rex and Hannah are imposters, and finds the tiara in their office, so he lets Prue go. Leo says he has to leave, but that he'll be back, and disappears out the front door in a sparkle of glowy lights...

"Feats Of Clay" starts in Cairo, so presumably we hve an Egyptian themed story. Ah, Clay is part of a gang of three thieves, who are stealing an urn with a curse on it. Clay has to get it to San Francisco to get Phoebe to sell it. And Stacy Haiduk turns up as the guardian of the urn, killing one of the thieves with a tarantula... Clay still doesn't know about the curse though.

It ends up in the hands of Prue, who's got to save the auction house with a big sale. They find out the urn is stolen, and the auction makes the money necessary to save Bucklands.

The second thief gets killed by a scorpion once he's turned up in San Francisco and revealed everything to Prue.

Clay eventually breaks the curse by performing a selfless act, and the urn goes back to Egypt.

"The Wendigo" is the first "Charmed One gets turned into something silly" episode. In this case it's a sort of werewolf like beast that Piper gets attacked by and subsequently changes in to.

Piper's an AB Negative blood type... so's Andy, but Piper's worried if she needs a transfusion they won't have any.

Okay, this episode is rubbish... it was rubbish the first time I saw it, and it's still rubbish now...

Because I'm feeling like a glutton for punishment, I've now put on "Cube Zero" which is billed as a prequel to Cube. Considering how awful Cube 2 was, I don't hold out much hope for this one...

Ugh! Hope should not have been held out - it's extremely predictable, even the bits in the control room are obvious. You can see the setup for the start of Cube within the first ten minutes, and the controllers being part of the experiment is so unoriginal it's frightening. At least it's short!

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